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What
is Healthy Sex?
Sexual
energy is a powerful, very natural force in our lives. But like any natural force we encounter
-- be it wind, sun, rain, or our own laughter -- our sexual energy
has the potential to be channeled and experienced in either destructive
or life-affirming ways.
Healthy
sex involves the conscious, positive expression of our sexual energy
in ways that enhance self-esteem, physical health, and emotional
relationship. It is mutually beneficial and harms
no one.
For
a more detailed description of Healthy Sex see the HealthySex
CERTS model.
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In
this section:
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Negative
influences and problems
Unfortunately, we
live in a society that constantly bombards us with images of sex that
have very little to do with healthy sexuality.
In movies, on TV, in books, and in magazines we are exposed to
countless examples of impulsive, irresponsible sex.
People are treated as sex objects and sex is often portrayed as
a form of power and control over another person. It’s no wonder that many of us have experienced
some tragic consequences of mischanneled sexual energy, such as sexual
abuse, compulsive sexual behaviors, sexual exploitation, sexually transmitted
diseases, unwanted pregnancy, and/or chronic sexual unhappiness.
Studies
in America reveal that:
- 1 in 3 females
and 1 in 6 males are sexually abused in childhood.
- 1 in 4 women are
raped sometime in their lifetime.
- 1 in 4 Americans
will have a sexually transmitted disease some time in their lives.
- 1 in 2 American
women will have at least one abortion by the time they are 45 years
of age.
- 1 in 20 Americans
(mostly male) engage in sexually compulsive behavior.
- 1 in 5 women and
1 in 10 men report that sex gives them no pleasure.
What's been missing
Most
of the sex education available in the world today focuses on reproduction,
birth control and disease prevention. While this is important information, it stops short of
helping us learn what we need to know to prevent sexual abuse, addiction,
and dissatisfaction. In addition, many of us need new information to overcome
problems caused by past sexual hurts so that we can go on to experience
healthy sexual intimacy with a partner.
As
a sex educator and therapist, I meet many people who have trouble conceptualizing
Healthy Sex. They want
to know: "How does healthy
sex differ from sexual abuse?", "How does healthy sex differ from
sexual addiction?", and
"What are the conditions necessary to ensure that the sex I'm having
is healthy?"
For a more detailed
description of Healthy Sex see the HealthySex CERTS
model.
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What is Healthy Sex?
